In Kingdom Math part 1 we established a few fun facts. First, I have no concept of math whatsoever. I have no grid for it. I have no grid, PERIOD! Grids are linear and I am circular-ish. Second, math in Gods Kingdom requires the heart, not the head. It is like the gospel. You can know ABOUT Jesus by reading the gospel with your mind. Actually KNOWING Jesus requires reading the gospel with your heart. Lastly, God multiplies, the devil divides.
(Random jump to a topic that seems random but will tie in nicely)
A couple of months ago a dear friend asked me how I was partnering with rest in this season of my life. Rest? Please! I will rest when I’m dead! Between my FOMO and the fact that I have 4 kids, there is no partnering with anything but adventure and chaos. It is happy chaos, but it is not restful. Indeed, rest is about as foreign to me as math. Like math, I remember being forced to do it as a child… but I don’t use it every day as an adult. So when my friend brought up a foreign concept to me, naturally I had to study it.
Of course I first approached the subject with my head and my mind. I looked up the definition of rest. I looked up “sabbath”. I looked up how much sleep I was supposed to get a night. I bit of advice…don’t ever look up how much sleep you are supposed to get a night. The stress from knowing that you are failing at sleeping will keep you up at night. I wrote down a “rest plan”. I applied logic. I don’t rest. I need to rest. Here is how I will rest. But rest became just another thing I had to check off of my massive to-do list each day.
Am I the only one who is guilty of seeking God on something only after I have exhausted all of my mental resources? So once again I attempted to approach the subject of rest…but this time with my heart. “God, what is it that you want me to know about rest?”
Remember, Kingdom math is heart math. It is 5 smooth stones + one boy = 1 dead giant…with a remainder of 4 smooth stones. It is Gideon + 300 men + trumpets and torches > 135,000 Midianite soldiers. It is 5 loaves + 2 fish = dinner for 5,000. God takes what we have and He multiplies it. This is what He spoke to my heart:
“Rest = Jesus. Period.
Jesus + anything = you – Jesus.
Striving requires expenditure. Expenditure requires rest. Rest is just Jesus. Don’t add anything. Don’t subtract anything. You are not just a faith machine designed to spit out miracles, signs, and wonders. You are a human being. You are a daughter in need of rest. When you abide in Jesus, miracles, signs, and wonders are simply the overflow of intimacy. They are the biproduct of relationship with Him. If you attempt to do anything outside of relationship overflow it is you NOT ME. If it is you without me then you aren’t in relationship and you aren’t in rest.”
If the Y axis was “ouch” and the X axis was “freedom”, I was located at the exact intersect point. After a response like that you’d think that I would have known better than to open my mouth. Nope. I had the audacity to put my sassy pants on and defend myself…to God. Don’t. Just don’t. Don’t be that girl.
I said “But God! I have healed the sick. I have raised the dead! I have cast out demons in your name! I would even cleanse the leper if I knew what that was! Isn’t that a sign that I have “arrived” as a Christian in relationship with you?”
To my surprise Gods answer was gentle and gave me such hope! I was half expecting Him to say “Dial back the moxie, sass-mouth!” Or maybe I expected Him to remind me of Matthew 7:21-23 and tell me to depart because He never knew me. Maybe smite me on the spot?
Instead He said “My daughter, miracles, signs, and wonders aren’t a stopping point! They are merely Version 1 of what I have planned for those who know me. I am transforming you from glory to glory. Therefore I have infinite versions ahead of you! The best is yet to come!”
Woah. Did you catch that?! Did your heart just leap? Mine did! More! I want more of Him! Thinking about the infinite possibilities God has for those who know Him and abide in the restful position of relationship with Jesus made me so hungry for more of Him. Im so glad I finally took a heart approach to rest. I get it now.
“Let us, therefore make every effort to enter that rest” (Hebrews 4:11)